"Imagine all the people sharing all the world.." - John Lennon

this is what my room looks like right now. this is just my packing supplies laid out. No wrapping paper yet, or the gifts and already a mess.

my bedroom floor

my bed is covered in bags and gifts i need to wrap.

(no, that's not a stuffed animal, that's my little maverick sporting a terrible hair cut. i think she was daydreaming, like her mommy. )

I was listening to my holiday Christmas mix and all I could think of was my brother, perhaps a little scared on a plane, trying to be strong and wanting to be anywhere but on his way to Iraq.

the song "Someday at Christmas" came on:

"Someday at Christmas there'll be no wars
When we have learned what Christmas is for
When we have found what life's really worth
There'll be peace on earth


Someday all our dreams will come to be
Someday in a world where men are free
Maybe not in time for you and me
But someday at Christmastime..."

all i could do is cry. life isn't fair.

i know it's me, his little sister being sad. My brother is probably on the plane listening to his iphone and most importantly, prepared to do his mission. He is not scared, he is brave. I know he doesn't want to go but i know he is proud to serve and protect. It's what he's wanted to do since he was a child; fly in helicopters.

so i will be a strong sister. i will be a most proud sister.

my favorite Christmas song is "Oh Holy Night." I get goose bumps whenever i hear it. Here is my brother's most favorite celebrity crush (since he was in high school).

for my brother, love your sister.