10 honest things.

I love this award. I love the meaning behind it. I was thankful to get it the first time round, and twice as thankful to be awarded by the beautiful & smart (she just started her own business!)Arianna Belle. Thank-you!!!

Following the rules, i will divulge 10 honest things about myself, and pass it on to 7 fabulous blogs.

In the past, i've used random facts and although honest- were just random. This time, i'm going to try to get really honest. Small confessions.

1.) At 25, i have never lived alone. Always with roommates or a serious boyfriend. This is a regret.

2.) i really need to quit this for all the right reasons (health, stinks, health, expense, health!!!) but i want it for all the wrong reasons (vice, socially, habit).

3.) the following from Sense & Sensibility describes my personality (it is both my charm and deep flaw):

"She was sensible & clever but eager in everything;

her sorrows, her joys, could have no moderation."

4.) i regret the one time my pappa wanted to be a chaperon on a trip with me in junior high and i wanted my momma to go instead. my heart still hurts when i think of it. Thankfully, it was only that one time. In fact, in high school i would invite him to eat lunch with me and my friends in-the- cafeteria. i was proud of him. And just so you know... i was a senior class favorite. *wink

5.) i still miss the girls i am no longer friends with because of a falling out years ago, and wonder why when you are younger- you let the silly things matter. A friendship break-up is almost worse than one with a lover. i wonder if they ever miss me too...

6.) i stopped going to church for a good few weeks because of out of town trips or honestly- because i'd just sleep in. i went back last Sunday and needed it. i left filled with joy, comfort, and gratitude.

7.) i constantly think about my weight and wish i was more motivated to lose the pounds i've gained. i think i'd be more happier/prettier... and my boyfriend would love me more.

However, i did give away my "skinny clothes" and it felt empowering.

8.) sometimes i'd rather go to bed then "talk it out." i never used to be like that.

9.) related-- my biggest fear is being numb. being indifferent.

10.) i wrote this almost a year ago. It was weird to find it again. i am glad i found the courage to yell:

"Right now I want to yell "enough" to the man who holds my heart.

For now, I will grab take-out for the man who wants to hold my heart."

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wow, i didn't expect that to be so exhausting. i winced at some of the things i shared, but i wouldn't have been awarded the honest scrap without being it right? Being more honest is something i want to do more of... honest with myself, my feelings, most importantly- my relationship.

i pass this on to these 7 fabulous blogs (i won't use the same girls who did this the first time round) :

ash/m/missy/krissa/cc/kenna/laura

i can't wait to read your answers!!! xo